a lesson in love

yesterday i had the incredible fortune of watching one of my best friends get married. 
watching them surrounded by the green and yellowing leaves of fall was like watching a deer in the woods. somewhat unbelievable and incredibly beautiful.

i love to tell the story of how she and i became friends. we did our undergraduate degrees together and were acutely aware of each other for 4 years. we had been in multiple classes and seminar groups together over these years and never said a word to the other. in fact, as two sufferers of 'chronic bitch-face' we did what we thought was necessary and exchanged dirty looks, for FOUR YEARS. 
until in our senior year medieval sexuality class - something inspired a burial of the imaginary hatchet (because truly neither of us had any good damn reason to not like the other), we started to bond. and we have been connected deeply ever since.  

when i moved from toronto to kingston for graduate school, she had just graduated from teacher's college and was planning to stay in town (having recently begun dating her husband). she guided me through the process, even vetting my apartment for me, and became my face to call home in this new town.

everyone should be so lucky to have a friend like her, and i spent much of yesterday bubbling with honour and pride and excitement that she and her lovely husband (!!) have welcomed me into their hearts and this new chapter of their lives. the love i saw and have seen between the two of them is something i hope to have, its simple, its true, and its beautiful. 

Take 5 -ii

damn martha!

Taking 5 minutes, to think about 5 things. I'll have some real content/more anecdotes from my world over the weekend. But, between working full time (with my contract coming to an end) and worrying about heading back to school, my brain is fried. like an egg. So here is what I could muster to think about today:

1. I read here that you're supposed to drink 3 LITERS OF WATER PER DAY. Full disclosure, I came to this article via LaurenConrad.com (admittedly one of my favourite blogs of all time, LC is the new Martha and I love Martha).I have been doing this for the better part of 2 months. My skin is much clearer, but I-PEE-CONSTANTLY. 
2. Kathleen Madigan. Who KNEW?! She's a hilarious lady. Laughed out loud (more like cackled) on the subway and at the gym. P.S. Rdio? Best ever. 
3. Billy Crystal on Robin Williams at the Emmys. I don't even know what to say. I haven't known what to say about Robin Williams. So I haven't said anything. I don't think I have to anymore. 
4. Taking this class at Barreworks today. I am not, repeat NOT ballet coordinated. Has anyone tried barre? thoughts? warnings? Please share!
5. I've been working on my sleep hygiene. Its going well. I'm tired but getting much better quality sleep in preparation for school..."Barf me to death, and other things I've been known to say" - the great, Mindy Kaling.

*P.S.: My bad, I am taking the Mixed Level Barre class at Barreworks. The description is on this page somewhere.Don't be sleepy and enroll for exercise classes. Or blog, I guess?

Take 5 - i

Welcome to Take 5, something I plan to do once a week is just to take 5 minutes and think about 5 things. I don't think it really matters what the 5 things are, but just think about them. 

via imgfave

1. "Foodie" is a nonsense term. I'm not quite so political as this, I just think its a dumb thing. 
2. What do you think the next food trend is? You know, how people obsessed over kale this year, quinoa last year, and sweet potatoes the year before? My friend Becca thinks chard. 
3. I'm trying to streamline and replace all my gross/old/smelly/torn stuff. Adios neon lace underwear and formerly white t-shirts, hit the bricks!
4. I have finally found a pair of earrings I can finally wear. Usually wearing earrings makes me aware that my ears exist, because I am a weird. But these are perfect, in rose gold. And adorable. And I love them. Say finally again. "FINALLY."
5. If I see one more flower crown, I'm going to lose. my. shit. I never thought I would say it, but I agree with Courtney Love on this one. 

What are you thinking about?

I hope your Monday is not totally miserable. 

i love you, but...

Oh Toronto, I love you. But, riding the subway is like a preview of hell. Full disclosure, this happened to me on Thursday.

Eric Tussler, 1966. via Toronto City Archives

I should have known that the ride would be hellish when I sat down beside a dozy middle-aged woman playing Candy Crush at the very back of the car. Quietly enough I sat down and guffawed over Me Talk Pretty One Day (David Sedaris-you are a genius), and an announcement is made. When I am trapped in a steel tube underground, I want to hear the damn announcement. 

ARE YOU LISTENING, TTC? TURN THE DAMN SPEAKERS UP. UP! TURN THEM UP! No one has EVER heard an announcement made while the subway is moving. NO. ONE. Passenger Emergency. Signal errors. Holding here. Perfect.

I will say that I am fairly content to keep reading, but I at this point I am struggling with the fear that I'll finish the book before the train lurches onward. Four eastern-European women (it doesn't matter, but it also kind of does), obviously tourists as demonstrated by their head-to-toe waterproof safari gear and zealous use of all safety straps on their backpacks-get on the train clutching their fanny packs and those funny wallet-necklaces. That was a fun distraction. One of them looked me in the eyes, reached under her shirt and unzipped an under-your-clothes moneybelt to produce tour packages for Niagara Falls. 

What should have been a 20 minute commute more than doubled to just under an hour. During which time, I read the back of the tour package, learned that the under-the-clothes money belt lady thought I was a real threat of mugging her and had comically poor balance. 

Fast-forward to finally getting off the train, the wind caught my dress and blew the skirt up. All the way up. I growl and stomp onward to my office. I wish this wasn't an almost daily occurrence, but it is. I just don't know that there is a future for me and skirts, the relationship is just too precarious.

How do people wear skirts and dresses when it is windy? How do fancy ladies do it?

Does anyone have a trick? Do I just need to resign myself to pants? Things are getting weird, send help. 

um, hey.

That's me, at Mardi Gras in New Orleans this year. It was raining, and
I had recently been scratched down the arm by a toy tomahawk.

I was cruising the internet, as I am known to do- when I began to wonder why a blog doesn't exist (that I can find anyways) that just talks about how weird it is to be in your twenties? Why is it that every blog I've seen that is written by a twenty-something is either about fashion or about getting hired?

Full disclosure, I'm not knocking these blogs. I read them. Faithfully. I'm just saying, as what I consider to be a fairly normal(ish) 23 year old, I'm not jaunting around posing in Louboutins or fretting about the perfect font for my resume; and I definitely feel like being a "social media maven" is a magic trick created by people my age to make existing professionals feel old. Contentious?

I think that the internet is a cool place. But I know that writing a blog doesn't make a person an expert. On anything. I mean, I have a blog. I'm an expert, pretty much on nothing... But the internet is also a messed up place where nasty people are allowed to hide behind avatars and user names and talk smack (see also: bully, torment, etc.) about perfect strangers. I have always subscribed to the logic of, if you don't like it, don't read it.

I'm a twenty-something, and frankly I have my shit together. Or at least, it is in the process of coming together, but I have direction. I use post-it notes indiscriminately, I wash my hands a lot, and I have never successfully finished a lip balm before losing it; I take losing it as the sign that the lip balm is done.

I have started probably 4 blogs before this one, and I somehow doubt that this will be my last foray into blogging (even though I sometimes think it is dumb). I use Instagram, but I rarely post pictures of food, and mostly I use it to post pictures of my dog. I have always fantasized about being Martha Stewart, but I have what my mom calls "a mouth like an un-flushed toilet".  I have a lot to say. Often, I will talk to anyone about anything. So, awaaaay we go.

So, hey. I'm Haley.

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